I have been very fortunate to have my daughter interested in potty training at quite a young age! At about 18 or 19 months she started to show great interest in the potty and the whole process of sitting, wiping, washing hands, etc. that she watched mommy and her friends at daycare go through. By 21 months, after only a couple of days of really trying to teach her how to use the potty herself, she was completely daytime trained. Now, 3 months later, we still use pull-ups at nap and bedtime but otherwise we are very lucky to not have to even worry about an accident during her waking hours (even on the recent 2 day drive to Florida!).
Unfortunately, having a 2 year old who is potty trained is not quite as easy when out in public as it is at home! I find myself always aware of where the closest washroom is and planning trips to the toilet before leaving anywhere to go in the car, no matter how short the drive is going to be. My daughter also seems to be very aware of the closest washroom as she ALWAYS wants to give each of them a try. As time consuming and unappealing as going into every public washroom in sight is, I remind myself that at least I don't have to change diapers or worry about accidents.
Then, there is the issue of cleanliness. We all know that a public washroom, even at it's cleanest, just is not the same as the washroom at home or at a friend/family members home. They can be pretty nasty sometimes. When my daughter was toilet trained I purchased a portable potty seat that folds up and fits right inside the diaper bag (inside of a ziploc baggy first). It's perfect as my daughter feels much more comfortable sitting on it than the over-sized toilet seat and I know it's clean! So after a few outings, the cleanliness worry was behind me.
Finally, and my biggest on-going concern, is that when a 2 year old has to use the potty, he or she has to use it NOW!!! There is no waiting. We have a fairly limited window of time in which we NEED to reach a potty! I'm talking less than 5 minutes at the best of times. Which normally is not a problem because, as I said, I've already scoped out where the closest washroom is. However, sometimes there is only one stall. And sometimes, there is a line-up for that stall! So far, touch wood, we have been lucky and have been able to hold it and make it to the toilet just in time. But it is still my greatest worry.
Today, while out grocery shopping this was the scenario we found ourselves in. With a shopping cart half full of groceries, my daughter suddenly announces that she has to go potty. Stupidly hopeful I ask, "Do you have to go potty right now, or can you hold it for a bit?" Of course, we all know the answer to that question, so I reluctantly headed toward the one and only (unisex) washroom in the store. When we got there it was not only occupied but 2 other people were in front of us waiting to use it as well. Okay, I think, maybe I can distract her while we wait by talking about what we are going to make with the things in our cart to take her mind off having to "go". I say, in my most animated voice, "When we get home later, would you like to help me wash the carrots? We are going to cut them up to put into a stew! Do you like stew?". Her response is, "Mommy, POTTY!!! RIGHT NOW!!!" Crap.
So this is when I explain to my 2 year old that there is a line-up for the washroom. There is someone in there right now, and we have to wait our turn. Then I suggest to her that we sing her favourite song while we wait. Nope. That doesn't fly either. The minutes that follow were filled with begging, pleading, more explaining, and even tears. Through all of it, the other people waiting for the washroom, who could clearly see and hear all that was happening, just continued to give me sympathetic looks. I guess you could say that it was nice that they were giving me their sympathy, and really I have no idea how urgent their trip to the washroom was, but I couldn't help but feel frustrated.
Prior to having a toddler of my own requiring the washroom "RIGHT NOW!" I can remember on more than one occasion letting a mom and her child go ahead of me. Sure, I had to go (why else would I be there, waiting to use the public washroom) but it was clear, at least to me, that a child in need of the toilet took precedence! Luckily, we did make it to the toilet in time today. Thankfully, I didn't have to change her clothes due to a pee accident right there in the grocery store. But sadly, my poor daughter wasn't sure she would make it. She was unbelievably upset, completely stressed out, and likely very uncomfortable as she did her very best to "hold it".
All I can think now is, why did I not ask for those people to let us go first? I was so consumed with trying to comfort and encourage my daughter, and so angry that they did not
offer to let us ahead of them, that I didn't think at the time to ask. So now, I'm writing this blog to share with all of you my experience in great hope that the next time you are waiting in line for the washroom and a child comes up behind you who is clearly in desperate need of the toilet, if you can hold it, just long enough for them to go ahead of you, please,
please let them go first!!